I never asked my sleep doctor what the final goal was regarding sleep and wake times. I think part of me assumed change was impossible. And honestly it was; many afternoons, I cried on the way home from work because I was so tired and hated myself and what was the point?!
8:30 AM was my breaking point. I don’t know why. I’ve been able to wake at that consistently in the past. But I faced a mental block. And I don’t know why 15 minutes makes a difference, but I’ve been waking at 8:45 for over a year.
But something really weird is going on. For two weeks, I’ve been waking during the 7 o’clock hour, regardless of when I go to sleep. No naps, either. Am I tired? Yes. Haha. Yes.
It’s too early. What am I supposed to do at 7:05 or 7:27 or 7:43? “Draw or read or study Spanish or. . .” You know all I do is doomscroll. It’s just more time to marinate my brain in despair and outrage.
Is waking up an hour or two earlier than normal a perimenopause thing? Did my mother go through this and I failed to notice? My body just wants to find new ways to sleep weird, I guess.
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